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Who Am I?

I am becoming the person I hate the most.

How I wish to have a peacefull mind but don,t work.

Spend too much time with virtual world drown me into misery.

Recent posts


Oh well,, the number change. Bye to the 20's welcome to the 30's. Got nothing to expect in life just for being happy, cos that what is matter the most.
I am feeling gratefull for the things I've done and for the upcoming plans that I'm curently making it come true. I stand my ground even more firmly about not to let people bring sadness and negativities in my life. 
Life taught me, what it takes to understand which people to keep and to ditch out of my life. Decision has been made, I've shuted down energy consuming relationship and I am embracing for cutting off another relationship. What a way to start my 30's. To be honest I dont give a damn with those people who act like Dementor, sucking up people happiness.
Here is the thing, Indonesian has a serious problem for being such a jerk and not happy with other people's life decission. It happened to me and the most anoying thing the culprit of the nasty comments are my extended family. Those people always made …

huge crush

Have I told you lately I found out myself have a huge crush on someone.
Kinda ashame to say but hell who cares!!

All my fellow friends know I have a huge feeling for a brits actor. He is hot I may say. Ginger hair, soft and kissable lips (I guess so) and desperate yet lovely face. Been following his career since he was 11 yo and spent years saw him grow. Since the first time I laid my eyes on him I know he stole my heart right away. He is just a "sidekick" but still could grab the attention once a while.

Once I had a dream. He was in it. I met him by a coincidence in London's tube. My oh my, I asked him to rub my belly as I was pregnant (not his unfortunately :p). So, in my culture believes if a pregnant belly is rubed by a goodlooking person there is hope the baby will be born good looking as well. Hahahaha...

Couple nights ago I met him once again in my sleep. Again, it was set in London's tube. He was on the phone. I tried to make a contact by waving my hand but …

veinti nueve

I am afraid my blog post will be filled with my getting aged related only. Shame on myself. Hahaha...
Hell yeah, turned to 29 this month. I believe that is just number since am feeling 22 inside. I will keep in mind that am always in my early 22, that's the best way to stop aging. 
Am still on the road. Spent d-day worked in 10° celcius. Kudos to meself that can survive the weather.
Well... What to reflects this time of the year? Nothing much but just thanking the universe for all the wonderfull journeys I am having and will have in the future. 
My guy asked how do I feel, and I replied "I have no other options but to be happy. I have experiences smiling at the memory from the past and regreting that I didnt cherish the moment back then. So now I want to smile not smiled!".
I want to be happy because I need it.

Hi! I am Me.

​ I reached the point when listen to people calling others by their race or nationality make me sick. To me it sounds superiority or else inferiority.

At first I told everyone where am from just to let them know "who I am". Lot of reactions overthe statement just because they know a lot, somewhat don't know, and maybe don't know anything at all. I decided not to brag more about how beautifull my country is, or how rich in culture we are. I let them know I am as person and not give them a chance to generelasize my people just because a single me.

For your concern, that is not easy since you live in world full of prejudice. Before I steped in Australia some said Aussies are frickin racist. Once I live around that is make sense. This kanggoroo land is any etnicity melting pot. You name it you got any race you want.
But, it would too much if I say all Aussies are racist, because all other people are.
I work with different kind of nationalities one time. Everyone talked about …


I haven't touched my keyboard for so long.
It was long time ago since the last time I blog walking.
How could I do that to myself? Why did I let myself take out the excitement of reading friends' blogs and focus on social media for long?
I found the exicitement today after blogwalked for few minutes. This is the kind of refreshing I need: sit for hours staring at little screen of my broke-hinge laptop and smiling for the lights thoughts of my fellow.
Guys, if you read this, I would like to thank you for letting me know what are those deep inside your mind. If it is not enlighting it is just good.
Have a good day you all!


I thought I could overcome jelousy. The fact, it is not as easy as it seems. Just imagine, you and the other is in the same state but the other one got better treatment that you. How would you feel? That is a shitty feeling I should face. And my self esteem went downhill like hell. I am sad.